Be Not Afraid

I've had two conversations today with friends who said they had been afraid to phone me, essentially because they're afraid of my cancer. They did phone nonetheless, thank goodness. I told them both that I'm not afraid, at least not right now. My practice is to stay in this moment, and as I have been doing that, I have noticed that there is no fear in this moment. Sometimes there is grief and sadness. Much of the time there is contentment; sometimes, joy. But there has not been any fear for two or three weeks, I think since about halfway through my first chemotherapy, when I noticed I wasn't throwing up or having any of the other dire consequences I read about in "Chemotherapy and You" and "Radiation and You."

So, friends, be not afraid. I need you in my life, and I want you in my life, and I don't want fear to keep you out, or on my side, to shut you out. In fact, I don't want any negative energy around this illness at all. I'm looking for positive, healing energy, and love, love, love. I'm very much alive. I'm just as much me as ever. And I need my loved ones, worry-free.